~!!!~ BREATHLESS~!!!~

The gashes still bleed,

Making it hard to breathe...

Its Like a hole through my chest,
All it does is make me feel empty inside..
I can hear nothin but my soul scream..
i'v numbed myself,
but as i hear your name the pain starts coming.
makin me feel in my heart,
You are'nt there is any of my dreams,
All i see is an endless road..
i am looking for something,
something that i don't know..
I keep on running in the dark..
My feet taking me as fast as my racing heart..
Its not the darkness that scares me, Its the silence that engulfs me..!!
The uncertainty of my search makes me scream.
Yeah! I wake up screaming every night..
Making the gashes around the hole in my chest bleed...
No matter how much i want the time to stop..It passes...
Every tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise.
It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does..!!
The absence of u is everywhere I look..
No matter how much I try to numb myself the pain comes back..!!
I eat nothing and sleep like a zombie..
That is what your going away has done to me..!!

The events of the last few weeks have really made me wonder about alot of things..Like LOve and relastionships..!! Defining Love is the toughest task on this planet..Different people.different meanings..Defining a relationship still an easier task..Relationship is a connection made on d basis of trust,love,commitment and endless giving. But when i look at the incidents that take place it makes me wonder is there anythin called as EVERLASTING LOVE OR FOREVER WITH U......Is it easy to trust anyone..?? why cant we do so..didnt pur elders trust one another..why was it easier in their times and ours???? When asked this question people strart the blame game, men say its women who are bitches,women say nah we are innocent its men who are dogs...!! Therefore leading to an endless argument with no answers As we have read,heard and watched in the movies all about true love and all..does it really exist in real life..We all say we want love like that..then why dont we all make an effort to do so.Why do we hurt each other..WHY???? Don't once we put ourselves in the other person's shoes and think how much it hurts.. don't we even realise how much heartache it would cause..How afraid we'll feel when trusting anybody..men or women, heart is a heart the pain is piercing..! People say life is changing we need to think about our carriers and all dat bullshit...Well according to me it's a bunch of bullshit...Love is love people ....How can u leave somebody alone and devastated to make your life..What d u all think that the other person won't undrstand your goals and ambitons.Well in my opimion she/he will coz love is all about understandin and if they dont well too bad they are'nt worth it..! Why is it so diificult to come face to face with the truth why do u have to make so many excuses in d name of other things..People say it's the other person who makes it complicated or OH! NOO we can't hurt anyone, they have done alt..Really..guys when u are doin so u are hurting ur so called other half more than anythin..!! when people drift apart they say, Oh well!!! u know it was him or her..the distance came in between us or well they went with someone else...ahh we fell out of love..!! CRAPPPPPPPP again huh..!! how can anythin come in between pwople when u love one another another excuse is well we want to enjoy and not stagnate..Guys enjoyin neccassarily doesn't mean humping anyone u see..enjoying means relivin urselves from stress, there are lots other ways of doin so..!!! sometimes we let li'll arguments come in between us and we decide we have to leave d person..WHyyyy...why do so dont we fight woth our friends or parents or siblings do we leave them..Than why this person doesnt he/she special to u...More special than anyone when u can patch up with ur parents and peers why not that someone special..Arent they supposed to b closer to us than anyone!! Another thing most people belive what their friends or anyone has to say about their other half..i ask why....did u believe then before askin them out or anythin huh?? In love or anythin You are just supposed to believe the person u are with not the whole world..!!Coz in a relationship 2 is a company 3 is a crowd.!!! How can u let anyone break the trust u share with someone..!! In d end all i would say is no one is to b blamed..Its we who is to b blamed..Its we who takes people for granted and than blame it on evry other thing...Its just US..WE all have to work hard enuff so dat the essence and beauty of love doesn't die and d generation next to us gets a GREAt example about love..!!

Irelandddddd :))

I was watchin P.S. I Love U a really sweet sweet movie, won't say its d best but i still like it..!!!!
Well comin to the point Ireland was one of the locations..OMG....I so fell in love with that place :) <3
You know there are times when all we want is peace in our lives because we have had so much of crap, Ireland is pace like that where we can find peace..It's good runaway... Its my dream to go there sometime and explore the mysterious lands...Ireland is one of the largest islands in d world..It is in Europe and near U.K...
I don't know much about it but yeah all i know is someday i will b there standing in a cliff and watching d scenery :))

A wonderful story with a wonderful meaning :))

When I was a little boy, my mom liked to make breakfast food for dinner every now and then. And I remember one night in particular when she had made breakfast after a long, hard day at work. On that evening so long ago, my mom placed a plate of eggs, sausage, and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. I remember waiting to see if anyone noticed! Yet all my dad did was reach for his toast, smile at my mom, and ask me how my day was at school. I don't remember what I told him that night, but I do remember watching him smear butter and jelly on that toast and eat every bite! When I got up from the table that evening, I remember hearing my mom apologize to my dad for burning the toast. And I'll never forget what he said. 'Baby, I love burned toast.'

Later that night, I went to kiss Daddy good night, and I asked him if hereally liked his toast burned. He wrapped me in his arms and said, 'LittleBuddy, your Momma put in a hard day at work today and she's real tired. And besides-a little burnt toast never hurt anyone! You know, life is full of imperfect things...and imperfect people.I'm personally am not the best at some things either.'
What I've learned over the years is that learning to accept each other'sfaults - and choosing to celebrate each other's differences -is the one of the most important keys to creating a healthy, growing,and lasting relationship. My prayer for you today - is that you will learn totake the good, the bad and the ugly parts of your life and lay them at thefeet of GOD. Because in the end, He's the only One who will be able to giveyou a relationship where burnt toast isn't a deal-breaker! We could extend this to any relationship in fact - as understanding is the base of any relationship, be it a husband-wife or parent-child or friendship!!"

Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket -but into your own.

No one else can MAKE you happy, Your happiness is a choice you make. See through God's eyes and feel through God's heart, and you will appreciate the value of every soul including yourself.

People will always forget what you do, and they will always forget what yousay, but they will never, ever forget the way you make them feel.

The Dog whisperer - my fav show on TV

I LOVE THIS SHOW MAN AWESOME =)
The show starts with Ceaser Milan on roller skate with 10 dogs and then he takes up cases of various dogs..!! I mean its magic as soon as Milan comes near the dog, how aggressive it is..it calms down...
The way he deals with dogs issss sooo cool..breathtaking..
according to Milan," he rehabilitates dogs and trains people".. his main approach when he deals with his cases us being "calm and assertive". Milan states that ur dog is the reflection of ur emotional state..
Milan runs a Dog psychology centre...which has around 30-40 unadoptable dogs..!!! and his favourite out of them is Daddy:))
strangely Milan has no formal degree in psycholgy.. He read few dog books and that's how he strted to work..!!
according to me Milan is so awesome and the show gets five stars *****

FOR MY BESTEST FRIEND:) ANU (:

Three years ago we talked to each other,
without even knowing we would end up here
sharing the most beautiful bond ever shared
Yes it is U and Me.."The Bestest of Friends",
Bestest of Friens THat is wat we are
Bestest of FRiends is wat we will be.

We shared our deepest secrets which we thought we could tell no one
We stood by each otherwhen there wasnt anyone
We listened to each other with the understanding of a mother
played all the pranks with the bonding of twoo mischevioes frinds.
understood each others relationships with the insight of sisters...

We travelled throughh many crushes breaking many hearts...breaking our too
but wat helped to deal with the pain was our friendship my dear
Moments of emptiness and desolation were not there bcause u were just a phone call away
We fought, we laughed We cried & We shopped
But the m,ost important thing that we learnt together was to deal with life
Thank u for being my pillar of support
Today I am far Away but I know M nearest to your heart
No words can ever explain the wat i feel for u
Nobody can ever take ur place..!1
wherever i go the truth will always be,
BESTEST OF FRIENDS WE ARE...
BESTEST OF FRIENDS WE"LL CONTINUE TO Be

MADE FOR MUMMY ON MOTHER'S DAY

ON MOTHER'S DAY

I lived inside u for a long time, but i bet i will always live in ur heart forever..
u are like a star who always hines abpve my head..
keepin a watch from this wicked world
u are my guardian angel...an angel God created with love and care
some1 who taught me how to deal with life.,.
some1 who made me who i am
some1 who suppportd in midst of every crisis from assignments to crushes to heartaches
who wiped my tears whn i was all alone..
some1 who saw me beyond who i was..
encouraged me and gave me that push...
some1 who loves me without askin for anythin in lieu...
the endles love and care i have no word for..
Dear Mother how much i love u cant be expressed...but all i knw is
that wherever i go i'll carry u in my heart..
U are one of the most precious Diamonds that God embedded in my heart
no1 can be so strong as u mummy,,,
no1 can face life with so much ease and finesse...
the way u win battles with a smile..
love u mummy , love u alot...
may lord bless u with happy life and soul..

MJ- the legend

I wasnt ever the biggest fan of MJ...
I always and always enjoed hindi music..
but after his death i dont know why i have started to love him <3 <3
I eamn the man dances like a dream and once you litsn to his songs you feel like wearing your dance shoes and hitting the floor..!!
i admitt i dont understand what he talks about in his songs..but i would say i love them still..
My favs are-:
1. smooth criminal
2. beat it
3. black or white

i love them
It feels sad that the world has lost such a great singer and dancer..one of the most promsisng personalities of all times..BUt all i would say is not matter what MJ still lives in people's heart..:))
Love u MJ
R.I.P

BOOKS IN MY LIFE :))

I am a reader, a vorcacious reader...I mean when i start to read i forget evrythin..eatin,drinkin and sleepin...LOve it <3... I'v read a lot of books and all of them some how have made an impact on me..!! I stared reading whn i was like 8 years old, my first books as i remember were Cinderella, snow white and little read riding hood.. i was in love with Cinderella for a long time.and as i grew up I started reading the Famous five..one of the best novel series by Enid Blyton...I still chersih those books...i think they got me addictted to reading.. Then i read the chicken soup series awesome..i learnt(or may be tried to) a lot of stuff from them..!!
some of the best books that I'v read are "Not without my daughter" "Eragon-series", "twilight-series", "the Kite Runner- one of the AWESOMEST books of all times","Princess series","The monk who sold his Ferrari" and the most recent one "The memoirs of a geisha- breathtaking and awesome" i love readin any kinda books..I dont have a specific genre..!!


some books I'd love to read-
1) atonemet- have it but trying to read it
2) Jane austen novels..- english is too hard to understnd LOL ;)
3) Anna karenina
4) The Alchemist( dyin to read it)
Books are somethin that can take us from one worl to another...They area great source to de-stress and relax..:)) i love my books.... They are something that i'll cherish all my life.....

a poem that i wrote for my bful sister:)

When I came here I was all alone..

There wasn’t anyone I could call my own

I felt lost..

In the crowd in the culture ….

I had lost faith in God, in people and sadly myself…

Evrythin I did went wrong..!!

But a turnin point came..!!

It had to come I guess

God sent an angel in my way..!

An angel so beautiful not from the outside but from within..

I could see her purity from her deep brown eyes..!!

It was u my dear elder one it was u…

You adopted me as ur sister..

Always treated me as ur own..

never distinguishing between the ties of blood and ethinicity

u wiped my tears when I cried..

yelled at me when I needed a shout..

helped me remain firm on the ground whn I was flyin high..not so coz u were jealous but because u didn’t want me to get hurt if I fell down..!!

always backing me and supporting me..

holdin my finger when u saw I was getting lost..

treatin me to yummy ice- creams, chocolates and biscuits..!!

believing in me….and most importantly makin me belive in myself

tellin me how strong I was whn I thought I was loosing…

I still remember ur lines “ u never loose a friend u loose accquaintances”

Which makes me come to senses whn someone fights with me

U cant thank a mother and a sister for their Love and care..

And same is the case with me my dear..

Never will I b able to express my gratitude..

But what I can promise is that no matter what I’ll always b there for u..!!

havent been writin much recently:(
but will be back soon
xoxoxo

waiting for you.!!!

Rainy dark night, nothing clear and bright feeling all alone, with a battered and bruised soul..
where are u i dnt knw..
who are u i dnt knw but whoever u are, i want u to come..
come here and take me in ur arms..
take me to a place with no tears and sorrows..
a place without any complications and confusions..
hold me when its stormy, kiss me when it rains.. dnt lemme go even if i want to..
and in lieu of that i promise to hold u in my arms forever protecting u from all pain and tears.. promising to lead when u are scared,,,
hold ur hand forvr in despair..
waitin fr u with all my heart come soon my love, come soon,..!

when you left..

i closed my eyes i saw ur face
i opend my eyes i saw ur face..
each heart beat had ur name..!

sittin alone in the twilight
i rememberd the time we shared
remmeberd ur lingering touch..
rememebrd the way u held my hand..
rememberd the way ur breath felt when u used to b near me..
the way u stroked my hair whn i used to sleep..
rememberd ur arms around me, the safety and warmth i used to feel..!!
the rain reminded we of the laughter we shared..
every sunset reminded me our quite moments..
with each breath i remembered ur scent..!
now u are but your memories are alive
with every second that i survive,,!!
even if everythin changes..my love for u will always be the same..
wherever i go i'll carry ur memories...
smile at the happy ones and cry over the bads...
thanx for the moments and evry second u spent..